What's That About?

Some of my earliest memories saw me curious as to why a song was written, or why similar artistic expressions were created; but something Jason Wade said made a lasting impression on me.

In 2001, Wade's band Lifehouse released their first album, No Name Face. Thanks to its leadoff hit single, "Hanging By a Moment", the album was climbing the charts. Wade's soulful and unique voice were on full display, singing some of his most heartfelt and personal lyrics behind the band's tasteful and catchy blend of bass, drums, and electric guitar.

The song peaked at number 2 and wound up as the Billboard 100 top single of 2001. It's important to note that more basic rock music was in a popularity lull, and for a rock song to be a huge success in 2001, it was hugely connecting with the masses.

In the midst of that whirlwind and life-changing year for them, Lifehouse was a featured guest on a show that played music videos. Throughout that show, the host asked the band questions between cueing to videos.

In one segment, Wade was asked why he wrote "Hanging By a Moment's" painfully personal lyrics—his sentiment that followed will always be with me.

Debuting in the summer of 1997 was VH1’s Behind the Music. It was a documentary series that profiled a band or artist, aired in one-hour episodes and became one of the network's most popular shows. Whether or not I enjoyed the music of the artists being profiled, I watched every episode.

Part of each Behind the Music was these musicians' journeys from young and emerging to their current state, mixed with reflection and at least some regret. There were many friends, family, and peers interviewed for each episode.

Previously untold or not widely told stories from each episode were huge for Behind the Music’s success. I became fascinated by the close view of artistic integrity and its fluctuations throughout the careers that each show profiled.

The episodes featuring artists lamenting a lack of artistic integrity at some point in their career resonated with me the most, even before I had any creative or artistic aspirations shy of notebook jotting for me and me only.

When Jason Wade was asked what "Hanging By a Moment" was about while on that television show, he copped to a shred of annoyance, and that he'd been deluged with the question. Wade said he respects the question and those curious of stories behind his lyrics, but cited his reasons as private. For any songs he has or will write, Wade wants the listener to make the lyrics their own for whatever they may need them for.

Wade's real time insistence and artistic integrity as an emerging 20-year-old singer/songwriter instead of a reflective, Behind the Music-like view resonated deeply with me.

Opposite of Wade's approach are those who pursue the fame and fortune that this world froths over. Once privacy is exchanged for fame and fortune, regret washes through, eventually desiring to be a "normal" person again instead of an interchangeable product for exploitation and profits, among other seedy aspects of celebrity culture; unless terms are set and held, early and often.

Twenty years later, I have pieces of me in the world via my words, with many more to come. Some things I’ve published have garnered "what's that about" questions from readers.

There is definitely value in vulnerability, yet Jason Wade’s sentiments in 2001 have helped steer how to handle my writing divulgences.

Success has been found by those who are relatable. In turn, like any proven approach, vulnerability has become a marketing tactic. Predictably, it can and does go too far. Charades or sincere, vulnerability has become part of branding, a term I find oxymoronic with vulnerability since being vulnerable requires utmost integrity, not forced and inorganic as branding can be.

Anything I have and will pour into this world will bear big or small pieces of me. In the process, I promise to always maintain utmost integrity by never delivering vulnerability by exaggerating reality or to market myself. I'm not afraid of showing you who I am, but I also won't take away what you may need from what I write about.

Desiring to be a widely published writer is to accept that my life will be open for others to see all of the depths of my emotions. My experiences and resulting words are for our mutual information, entertainment, and catharsis. I wouldn't be in a place to do so if others did not bravely set their paths for me to blaze my own.

Music For My Soul: How Did You Love, by Shinedown

On any scale, legacy is important to everyone. Some have children—those who desire parenthood but can’t conceive adopt. Founding a business or inventing products we need and/or want will also cement a legacy.

While all noble, I believe the most important legacy is how you treat others.

Those near death consistently identify their only regrets as not spending enough time with loved ones. More material things, making more money, or more sexual partners doesn't equate to a fulfilling life when one is close to dying.

Excepting common sense, considering societal norms isn't a factor for what I ought to do or be. That’s largely why identifying as a writer and its boundless avenues suits me perfectly; the words I create and share will be a big part of my legacy. The rest of it will be who I choose to share my life with, and the memories we make through this madness we call life.

Ideal is not realistic but must be persisted. Finding and vetting those whose actions prove they love and accept the entirety of you are worth the time it takes. Unworthy ones reveal themselves with their absence when you aren't an asset to them. Trust me, and be diligent.

Participation in humanity equals supporting and connecting with each other towards love; that’s what this song means to me. Fear and greed will always be unfortunate and easily accessed human drivers, especially during pandemics, i.e. this current coronavirus and COVID-19 situation. Hacking into those traits succumbs the unaware, diverting them from the big picture and hidden truths.

We all have a voice and a heart. Our altruistic use of each will be a huge part in how we positively we reflect on a life lived, except sociopaths and other hopelessly selfish individuals. How faithful and generous your love is in every facet will be your legacy.

To quote a line from the song: “No one gets out alive, everyday is do or die; the one thing you leave behind is how did you love.”